Chapter 12 His Spot
I woke up to the smell of blood everywhere, it was overwhelming - human and something else, though I was not quite sure just what. I heard him breathe deep and wake up, he sniffed very loudly. He sat up quickly and stood up in front of me and before I could get up he put his hands on my shoulders and told me to stay there no matter what until he came back. He reached into the coat pocket and pulled out a small sharp blade and handed it to me, I did not know at first why. "In case you need it" I took it and just looked at it for a moment. I was starting to feel sick inside, I was beginning to become afraid.
He went to the door of the hallway, looked back to me one last time and told me again to stay there until he came back. He opened the door and looked out, I thought he would turn around again but he didn't. He just closed the door and I heard him walk down the hall to Collette's room, he opened the door and closed it quietly. I knew there was something wrong. I heard him go downstairs and open the bedroom doors of my staff and close them quietly.
I heard him slowly walking back up the stairs, my stomach inside started to turn I actually felt something I never expected to feel again, the urge to throw up. He opened the door and looked at me. "What is it?, what happened?" " I think Lynn is here" I shot up and he stood in front of me so to not let me out. I tried to push past him but I was still feeling pretty bad inside and he put his arms around me "Collette is dead Christine and so is everyone else" My knees went from under me but he held me up. He picked me up but I wanted to wiggle out and see " No Christine, please believe me, you don't want to see this, please just sit down."
He sat me down on the bed and sat next to me. He put the blade back in my hand again, " Don't let this go" I just held it in shock. I again noticed the other smell.
He took my hand and led me downstairs to the dining room. He told me to try not to breath in too much and don't look around at all. My stomach was in knots and he held my shoulders and kept me close to the wall and would not let me see past him.
He sat me down and told me to stay there, but I followed him anyway when he went to the door. He opened it, I don't think he realized I was behind him, and I could smell the other smell so overwhelmingly. I saw past him blood everywhere on the ground and the table and chairs. I also saw the Eagles or what was left of them, he turned around quickly and pushed me back into the room. "Don't come out here"
I lost my feelings after that and went numb. "Collette" I said, he took me over and sat me down on the chair. " Christine, do not leave this room, I will be back soon" I said nothing and just did what he told me.
"Collette" I said again, she was gone. I stared at the blade he had given me. 'In case I needed it' he said, 'For what' I thought. I had no desire to live anymore. Collette was gone, everyone I had known and loved all my life was gone now. Even the Eagles. It was so quiet, no squealing anymore, just the sound of the Ocean. He was all I had left, my maker. If I had been given the choice I would have turned Collette, it was my fault she came here, it was my fault she is dead, how was I suppose to live knowing that.
The Eaglets should have been feeding now, their happy squeals should be clearly heard all over, now there is nothing but the sound of the Ocean, the empty sound of an empty nest.
He came back and I could smell all the blood on him, normally it would have caused in me such an uncontrolled hunger I would not have been able to think straight, but knowing whose blood it was, I felt sick inside again.
"We are going to leave here now and forever and never come back to this place Christine" he said to me as he kneeled down in front of me. He took my face in his hands and kissed my forehead. I could smell it all so clearly on him. He put the blade back in my hand, " I am going down to the water and then I will be back in a few minutes, don't leave this room" with that he was off and out the door. I sat back against the chair and thought nothing. My mind was setting in stone I could feel it happening to me as I sat there alone.
Then I felt his fear all of a sudden for no reason. I got up and heard a female voice down at the beach. I did what he told me not to do and raced down the steps to see her there. This must have been Lynn. She turned and looked at me and her face was in the moonlight. He was standing in the water just as I had seen him first. She smiled at me. I lunged forward feeling the blade in my hand and he was in front of me between us not letting me past. ' No" I heard him yell at me in my head. There grew in me such a rage as I had never felt before, such powerful hatred, it burned inside like fire.
I could still feel his fear even more when his hands were on me. I looked into his eyes and I heard him say again ' No ' then I saw a sharp bright flash slip across his throat from behind him and blood start pouring out. He started to go limp and I tried to hold him up, but he fell and took me down with him, I could hear her laughing. I fell to my knees with him and when I looked at him again his green eyes were closed and his throat was slashed open and his head was just laying in my arm. His blood was all over me and I could smell it so clearly. "Shaun" I said and shook him a little bit, but he was motionless.
"He never was much of a man" she said as she came up behind me and touched me. I tried to get up but I did not want to let him go. The stone was setting in me even harder now and the fire was burning furious. I let him go and got up. She looked at me " You are beautiful aren't you, but I can see your probably not much in the mood tonight so I will come back and we can have some girl time soon together, I can do for you what he could not and better" She then leaned forward and kissed me fully on the mouth and licked my lips. I just went rigid with the feeling of her, which disgusted me, She then vanished and I saw a shadow go across the moonlit beach.
I looked back down at him, even now he was still so beautiful in the moonlight. I knelt beside him again and touched his face. His face was peaceful and beautiful. I just stared at him, he mouth was slightly open and I could see his fangs. I ran my finger across his lips and touched his fangs. I looked out across the Ocean and saw several large fins in the water, I knew what he had been doing now when he told me to stay inside. He was making sure everyone was gone and I would not have to see them.
I picked up his shoulders and quickly put my hand under his head. I cradled him in my arms and rocked back and forth they way he did with me the night he made me. I put my wrist to his mouth but he did nothing. I rocked back and forth with him for a while. Then I noticed he was becoming fragile in my arms. The tighter I held him the more I felt him break inside. I had to do what he did with Collette and the other's. I got up with him and pulled him into the water and walked out to his spot with him. I was still holding him, I touched his face and kissed his lips, which were now cold to me, for the last time and let him go. "Soon Shaun" I said as I watched him slip under the moonlit water. I remembered how frantically I searched for him the first night I saw him in this spot.
It was over now, it was all over the dream, the fantasy, the feeling. Now there was nothing but cold, not the cold I was use to but a new cold - it seems he had one last thing to teach me still.
The cold of death, of emptiness, of nothingness. There I stood alone in his spot. My chest completely seized up, I lost the feeling of breath in me, of life in me. The spot that was his, now was mine alone.
He came into my life like a shadow, who had been in my life all my life like a hint of a whisper in the dark. He took everything, he taught me everything. He taught me the meaning of desire, of love, he showed me things I could never have imagined on my own. He showed me the other world.
I touched my stomach where he gave me this. My hands were so cold. My mind was blank, there was no more feeling of him at all anywhere in my mind or my soul.
I would have given it to Collette too, but never got the chance.
How could death separate us. We were already dead. How is it I let him have everything of me. How was it I was no longer myself anymore.
What was life before him, I had one.
Was it wrong to have let him have it all, if it wasn't why did I feel this now ? Why did this happen? Had I gone against nature and the natural order of things ? Had I done the ultimate evil ? Did I deserve this, just for loving him and giving myself to him ?
Had he really taken everything is such a short time I began to become aware of the sound of the Ocean and the Crickets - it has such a lonely sound.
I wished what he had wished, that she would have just killed me sooner.
The tears started, I did not think I could still cry.
"Shaun" I whispered. I looked out to the end of the Ocean.
"Shaun" I looked down into the dark cold water "Shaun" I whispered again.
I could not live alone like this and I did not want to find anyone else to share this with. How could I love another the way I loved him, how could I ever have another friend like Collette, how could I ever want to hear other Eagles. I could never survive losing again.
I wished I had met him before when we were both alive, I could have given him a baby, I could then still have him with me, a reason for living - but I had nothing.
My head rolled back ' What am I suppose to do now?'
I was going to finish his life the way he originally planned, finish it for him, I was going to find her and kill her and then myself.
Perhaps we would be forgiven and I could be with him in another life, but he was taken without his choice - I made the choice to be with him, I let him do this to me, I asked him too. I made this choice, to be evil, I made the choice to take life. He would have already been forgiven, but what about me? I only wanted to love him. He though did have to make the choice to live life like this as well, could we then still be forgiven together.
I made this choice, was it then really all my fault?
My tears fell silently into the Ocean. "Shaun"
He went to the door of the hallway, looked back to me one last time and told me again to stay there until he came back. He opened the door and looked out, I thought he would turn around again but he didn't. He just closed the door and I heard him walk down the hall to Collette's room, he opened the door and closed it quietly. I knew there was something wrong. I heard him go downstairs and open the bedroom doors of my staff and close them quietly.
I heard him slowly walking back up the stairs, my stomach inside started to turn I actually felt something I never expected to feel again, the urge to throw up. He opened the door and looked at me. "What is it?, what happened?" " I think Lynn is here" I shot up and he stood in front of me so to not let me out. I tried to push past him but I was still feeling pretty bad inside and he put his arms around me "Collette is dead Christine and so is everyone else" My knees went from under me but he held me up. He picked me up but I wanted to wiggle out and see " No Christine, please believe me, you don't want to see this, please just sit down."
He sat me down on the bed and sat next to me. He put the blade back in my hand again, " Don't let this go" I just held it in shock. I again noticed the other smell.
He took my hand and led me downstairs to the dining room. He told me to try not to breath in too much and don't look around at all. My stomach was in knots and he held my shoulders and kept me close to the wall and would not let me see past him.
He sat me down and told me to stay there, but I followed him anyway when he went to the door. He opened it, I don't think he realized I was behind him, and I could smell the other smell so overwhelmingly. I saw past him blood everywhere on the ground and the table and chairs. I also saw the Eagles or what was left of them, he turned around quickly and pushed me back into the room. "Don't come out here"
I lost my feelings after that and went numb. "Collette" I said, he took me over and sat me down on the chair. " Christine, do not leave this room, I will be back soon" I said nothing and just did what he told me.
"Collette" I said again, she was gone. I stared at the blade he had given me. 'In case I needed it' he said, 'For what' I thought. I had no desire to live anymore. Collette was gone, everyone I had known and loved all my life was gone now. Even the Eagles. It was so quiet, no squealing anymore, just the sound of the Ocean. He was all I had left, my maker. If I had been given the choice I would have turned Collette, it was my fault she came here, it was my fault she is dead, how was I suppose to live knowing that.
The Eaglets should have been feeding now, their happy squeals should be clearly heard all over, now there is nothing but the sound of the Ocean, the empty sound of an empty nest.
He came back and I could smell all the blood on him, normally it would have caused in me such an uncontrolled hunger I would not have been able to think straight, but knowing whose blood it was, I felt sick inside again.
"We are going to leave here now and forever and never come back to this place Christine" he said to me as he kneeled down in front of me. He took my face in his hands and kissed my forehead. I could smell it all so clearly on him. He put the blade back in my hand, " I am going down to the water and then I will be back in a few minutes, don't leave this room" with that he was off and out the door. I sat back against the chair and thought nothing. My mind was setting in stone I could feel it happening to me as I sat there alone.
Then I felt his fear all of a sudden for no reason. I got up and heard a female voice down at the beach. I did what he told me not to do and raced down the steps to see her there. This must have been Lynn. She turned and looked at me and her face was in the moonlight. He was standing in the water just as I had seen him first. She smiled at me. I lunged forward feeling the blade in my hand and he was in front of me between us not letting me past. ' No" I heard him yell at me in my head. There grew in me such a rage as I had never felt before, such powerful hatred, it burned inside like fire.
I could still feel his fear even more when his hands were on me. I looked into his eyes and I heard him say again ' No ' then I saw a sharp bright flash slip across his throat from behind him and blood start pouring out. He started to go limp and I tried to hold him up, but he fell and took me down with him, I could hear her laughing. I fell to my knees with him and when I looked at him again his green eyes were closed and his throat was slashed open and his head was just laying in my arm. His blood was all over me and I could smell it so clearly. "Shaun" I said and shook him a little bit, but he was motionless.
"He never was much of a man" she said as she came up behind me and touched me. I tried to get up but I did not want to let him go. The stone was setting in me even harder now and the fire was burning furious. I let him go and got up. She looked at me " You are beautiful aren't you, but I can see your probably not much in the mood tonight so I will come back and we can have some girl time soon together, I can do for you what he could not and better" She then leaned forward and kissed me fully on the mouth and licked my lips. I just went rigid with the feeling of her, which disgusted me, She then vanished and I saw a shadow go across the moonlit beach.
I looked back down at him, even now he was still so beautiful in the moonlight. I knelt beside him again and touched his face. His face was peaceful and beautiful. I just stared at him, he mouth was slightly open and I could see his fangs. I ran my finger across his lips and touched his fangs. I looked out across the Ocean and saw several large fins in the water, I knew what he had been doing now when he told me to stay inside. He was making sure everyone was gone and I would not have to see them.
I picked up his shoulders and quickly put my hand under his head. I cradled him in my arms and rocked back and forth they way he did with me the night he made me. I put my wrist to his mouth but he did nothing. I rocked back and forth with him for a while. Then I noticed he was becoming fragile in my arms. The tighter I held him the more I felt him break inside. I had to do what he did with Collette and the other's. I got up with him and pulled him into the water and walked out to his spot with him. I was still holding him, I touched his face and kissed his lips, which were now cold to me, for the last time and let him go. "Soon Shaun" I said as I watched him slip under the moonlit water. I remembered how frantically I searched for him the first night I saw him in this spot.
It was over now, it was all over the dream, the fantasy, the feeling. Now there was nothing but cold, not the cold I was use to but a new cold - it seems he had one last thing to teach me still.
The cold of death, of emptiness, of nothingness. There I stood alone in his spot. My chest completely seized up, I lost the feeling of breath in me, of life in me. The spot that was his, now was mine alone.
He came into my life like a shadow, who had been in my life all my life like a hint of a whisper in the dark. He took everything, he taught me everything. He taught me the meaning of desire, of love, he showed me things I could never have imagined on my own. He showed me the other world.
I touched my stomach where he gave me this. My hands were so cold. My mind was blank, there was no more feeling of him at all anywhere in my mind or my soul.
I would have given it to Collette too, but never got the chance.
How could death separate us. We were already dead. How is it I let him have everything of me. How was it I was no longer myself anymore.
What was life before him, I had one.
Was it wrong to have let him have it all, if it wasn't why did I feel this now ? Why did this happen? Had I gone against nature and the natural order of things ? Had I done the ultimate evil ? Did I deserve this, just for loving him and giving myself to him ?
Had he really taken everything is such a short time I began to become aware of the sound of the Ocean and the Crickets - it has such a lonely sound.
I wished what he had wished, that she would have just killed me sooner.
The tears started, I did not think I could still cry.
"Shaun" I whispered. I looked out to the end of the Ocean.
"Shaun" I looked down into the dark cold water "Shaun" I whispered again.
I could not live alone like this and I did not want to find anyone else to share this with. How could I love another the way I loved him, how could I ever have another friend like Collette, how could I ever want to hear other Eagles. I could never survive losing again.
I wished I had met him before when we were both alive, I could have given him a baby, I could then still have him with me, a reason for living - but I had nothing.
My head rolled back ' What am I suppose to do now?'
I was going to finish his life the way he originally planned, finish it for him, I was going to find her and kill her and then myself.
Perhaps we would be forgiven and I could be with him in another life, but he was taken without his choice - I made the choice to be with him, I let him do this to me, I asked him too. I made this choice, to be evil, I made the choice to take life. He would have already been forgiven, but what about me? I only wanted to love him. He though did have to make the choice to live life like this as well, could we then still be forgiven together.
I made this choice, was it then really all my fault?
My tears fell silently into the Ocean. "Shaun"